So I know it's been a while since I've posted something. I admit that I've been slacking and I am going to change that. Hopefully, I'll be posting at least once a week now. I know...you are so excited that you can barely contain it. It's ok. Let out that scream of pure, undefiled joy. I'll wait...
Feel better? Good. Because here is what God taught me this week.
This past week, I had the opportunity to attend Student Leadership University 101 with a few students from our ministry. I've been to this event before and it is always challenging but there was something this week that really stuck out to me. It wasn't the roller coasters. It wasn't Sea World. It wasn't the AWESOME list of suggested books to read. It wasn't the straight-forward and humorous sessions led by Dr. Jay Strack, Brent Crowe or Chuck Allen. It was a quote in our workbook, that we didn't even discuss.
Now, I love SLU. I'm a big fan and I plan on taking my students to it when I "grow up" and get a full-time job. Also, in their defense, they have a TON of information to cover and I understand that they can't cover it all. But I happened to be flipping the pages when I saw the following quote on a page discussing "quiet times."
"My dear Jesus, my Savior, is so deeply written in my heart, that I feel confident, that if my heart were to be cut open and chopped to pieces, the name of Jesus would be found written on every piece." -St. Ignatius of Antioch
Wow.
After I read this, I immediately asked myself, "Can I honestly say that?" Can I honestly say that my relationship with Jesus Christ, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, the Creator, the Alpha and Omega, I AM Himself, is so deeply written on my heart that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that if I were to die for Him and you opened me up and chopped my heart into tiny pieces...you would find the name of Jesus Christ on every little piece? Can I, the same guy who slept in this morning because I was a little "tired" instead of getting up at a reasonable hour to spend time with Savior, honestly say that?? Can I, a man that is prone to wander and leave the God I love say that?? I'm ashamed to say "no."
Why not? Because I'm prideful. I care more about what people think (in some areas) rather than totally surrendering to the One who surrendered everything for me.
Obviously, as you can tell, this quote deeply convicted me. St. Ignatius was not saying that we need to be perfect, but rather that every single thing we say, do and think should SCREAM the name of Jesus. There should be no doubt whom our allegiance lies with. I want to make a difference for my King. I want that to be said of me, not for my own edification but rather for His glory. I'm honestly not there yet. But this was a proper kick to the seat of my pants that I need to get it together. Will people say that of me after I die? Will that be said of me if I get the honor of dying for the One who died for me? I'm not perfect, but this is my desire.
I find it interesting, and maybe even slightly ironic, that St. Ignatius was martyred for his faith by being eaten alive by lions in the Roman Colosseum. He was torn to shreds. He was ripped open by lions. His heart may have even been exposed after his body had been mutilated by the lions. Yet he died with the name of Jesus on his lips. On his heart. There was no denying whose side he was on. I pray it's the same for me.
